Blood in the Bathroom [Revised]

Blood in the Bathroom [Revised]

A single tear rolls down her face,
her vision is blurred,
she shuts her eyes and opens them quickly
in hopes it will stop the tears so she can see clearly again,
but it doesn't work.
She gives up.
She can feel her knees begin to quiver,
they give out, and she falls backwards.

She lands hard upon the concrete floor,
but she can't feel the pain,
or perhaps she just doesn't care.
She can't control the tears,
they flow down her cheeks,
they follow the creases in her face,
they drip off her chin,
landing on her blouse.
They create little translucent spots.

She wants to scream,
she wants to smash her head into the wall,
she wants to feel something.
anything,
she wants to end the numbness,
that seems to have consumed her.

She only knows one way,
one thing that can help her,
she pulls out the razor blade she had kept in her bag.
she didn't analyze what she was going to do,
she just did.

She shuts her eyes,
the tears still furiously falling.
They won't stop.
They drip into her cuts,
she knows they should sting, but
she can't feel it.

She begins to feel light headed,
the room starts to spin,
everything is a blur,
it looks as though she is trapped in a snow globe,
and someone is shaking it profusely.

Suddenly everything goes black,
she is frozen.
She hears a quiet persistent sound.
She can't decipher what it is.
She tries again,
this time she hears something,
her name, or at least she thinks it's her name.

It comes again.
It must be the angels.
His face flashes through the darkness.
Could it be her love,
could it be the one she loved so much.
why was he here,
was he saying her name?
He's gone, gone for good, he's never coming back
these words repeat over and over in her mind,
it's not him, it can't be him.

She can hear her name still begin called.
She wants to see where it's coming from.
She wants to know who is called out to her.
She wants him,
she craves the feeling of him wrapped around her,
she can smell him,
yet she can do nothing, she can't move,
she wants to run, she wants to find him,
she wants to see him.

She hears her name again,
but it begins to growing softer,
it seems to be fading away,
she wants it to stay,
where is it going?

Then as if she had been hit in the head with a blunt object,
her mind stops and becomes still.
Everything seems to have vanished again.
No sound, no feeling.
Just silence in this dark, dark place.

Yet far off in the distance she can see him,
she can see his soft glowing face.
And she can see a small, crystal clear tear,
roll down his cheek,
and as she starred at his face,
she thought she saw his mouth
form the words good bye
then once again she was engulfed in darkness.

Morgan.E.Doowrah
©2008